Pregnancy and Birth
A father's experience of postnatal depression a...
Becoming a father twenty years ago was a challenging experience, made even more difficult by my wife’s battle with severe postnatal depression and PTSD stemming from a traumatic birth that I witnessed. Back in 2004, mental health was rarely discussed in the media, which meant that many women suffered in silence for years. The struggles of fathers during the perinatal period were even less acknowledged. As a father, I made the difficult decision to give up my self-employed work to care for my wife. This shift brought about significant financial worries, especially since we had just purchased our first home. We were fortunate to have family nearby, but many families today find themselves moving away from their support networks. I vividly remember experiencing feelings akin to grief, longing for my past life I vividly remember experiencing feelings akin to grief, longing for my past life. It felt like we were...
A father's experience of postnatal depression and the need for better support
Becoming a father twenty years ago was a challenging experience, made even more difficult by my wife’s battle with severe postnatal depression and PTSD stemming from a traumatic birth that...
Vaginal Birth After Three Caesareans (VBA3C)
Shannon Whitlock shares the fight she took on to have the birth she longed for When I became pregnant with our fourth baby, I knew I would have a fight on my hands. While pregnancy was something I was familiar with, spontaneous labour and vaginal birth were not. They were things I felt I needed to experience. However, the way I was treated during that pregnancy was beyond what I could have prepared for. To understand how I ended up on the path of a VBA3C (vaginal birth after three caesareans), we need to go back through the pregnancies and births of my first three children. I was 18 when I discovered I was pregnant with my first child and six months into a new relationship with my now husband. I had planned and wanted this pregnancy, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t shocked. The pregnancy...
Vaginal Birth After Three Caesareans (VBA3C)
Shannon Whitlock shares the fight she took on to have the birth she longed for When I became pregnant with our fourth baby, I knew I would have a fight...
Postnatal Recovery: the importance of support f...
Postnatal care is the poor little sister of the birth world. Our culture focuses entirely on the baby rather than the needs of the new mother. This is reflected in the fact that the majority of the gifts given to new parents are baby clothes and toys. Yet, babies do not care for plush toys and clothing. What they need most, beyond warmth, shelter and food, is loving carers. It makes sense that attention and gifts, rather than being directed at the baby, ought to be directed at the mother. This wisdom is still part of many cultures around the world today, where new mothers are given a period of rest and nurture, lasting about a month, and during which other people take care of the household. It used to be part of western culture too, yet it has been lost in favour of a culture which glorifies a mother...
Postnatal Recovery: the importance of support for new mothers
Postnatal care is the poor little sister of the birth world. Our culture focuses entirely on the baby rather than the needs of the new mother. This is reflected in...
One mother shares her ritual of burying her pla...
It’s a mild autumn night. While singing, a procession of my closest female friends is moving into the backyard. I am kneeling down to touch it for the first time. Holding the umbilical cord, I am pulling the placenta out of the bag in which her inedible part has been frozen for the last four months (I drank the edible part in fruit smoothies the week after giving birth). How interesting to hold my own organ in my hands! The organ that was created by my body to nourish a new little being. The organ that secreted all the magical and crazy pregnancy hormones. The organ that provided my baby with nutrients and enabled him to breathe. The organ that protected him against infections and supplied him the required antibodies before he was born. The organ that my body created just for this. It is the only organ that a...
One mother shares her ritual of burying her placenta
It’s a mild autumn night. While singing, a procession of my closest female friends is moving into the backyard. I am kneeling down to touch it for the first time....
How trust and faith can help heal birth trauma
Throughout my second pregnancy I became aware of a theme emerging: that of faith, i.e. trust. It first came up in the early months; the word just kept popping into my mind and repeating itself throughout. I paid special attention because this was a quality I knew I needed more of. Through my rebirthing training I have learned that our early imprints from gestation, birth and childhood have a massive impact on our psyche and the way we view the world, creating a filter through which we decide the meaning of events. Also, more mysteriously, somehow the things that we expect have an amazing way of happening, be they positive or negative. When we have any challenging experience, our birth imprints get activated and will give us quite a ride unless we become aware of what is going on and work with it. Pregnancy is one of those times in...
How trust and faith can help heal birth trauma
Throughout my second pregnancy I became aware of a theme emerging: that of faith, i.e. trust. It first came up in the early months; the word just kept popping into...
Hypnobirthing: Erika Townend encourages us to u...
How do you begin to understand the notion of hypnobirthing? For some, depending on your lived experiences, this may come quickly, yet for others, hypnobirthing might be a curious concept that might take some time to get your head around. Perhaps you have never even thought that this could be relevant to you. Maybe a hypnobirth looks unattainable to you too. As with other things in life, we’ve all at some point been in awe of Someone Else’s strength and stood in astonished admiration of their resilience. Well, that Someone Else can be you too, in your labour: cool, calm and controlled. Would hypnobirthing sound more relevant and attainable if I told you that its power is already right there inside you? Remember, we all hold exceptional skills, it’s just that sometimes these skills are lost amongst the humdrum of life and the ever-turning hamster wheel. But buried somewhere in...
Hypnobirthing: Erika Townend encourages us to use our senses
How do you begin to understand the notion of hypnobirthing? For some, depending on your lived experiences, this may come quickly, yet for others, hypnobirthing might be a curious concept...
Beyond the Mountain: preparing for the postnata...
For many people, the experience of being in labour and giving birth feels like a mountain they have to climb. Often, when you’re pregnant, you can’t see beyond that mountain. You spend a lot of time thinking about your birth preferences, such as where to give birth, which birth partner or partners you hope will be there, what drugs you might want or not, and so on. Due to the looming, hulking hugeness of this mountain, few people remember that once they’ve climbed up it, they still have far to go on their parenthood journey. This is why, in my work as a doula, I always suggest my clients and I spend at least one antenatal session talking about their postnatal preferences. When I first bring up the concept, people often look at me oddly. Their understanding of the postnatal period tends to be that they’ll recover from birth and...
Beyond the Mountain: preparing for the postnatal period
For many people, the experience of being in labour and giving birth feels like a mountain they have to climb. Often, when you’re pregnant, you can’t see beyond that mountain....
Our mammalian instinct to prepare the birthing ...
What do we have to learn from other birthing mammals that can help the labouring woman? Michel Odent makes the case for de-humanising childbirth. At the end of her first pregnancy, Claire was living in a hostel. One day she decided that the bathrooms and the corridors were dirty. She felt an urgent need to clean them. When she walked out of the building, she had to sweep the pavement. The next day her labour started. Against all odds, Iona decided to stay at home for the birth of her first baby. She called me one afternoon as contractions forewarned her of the beginning of labour. Even before knocking at the door, I was intrigued by the noise of a vacuum cleaner. Between contractions, Iona was hoovering. During contractions, she was leaning on the back of a chair. Afterwards, I asked her if she usually did the cleaning in the middle...
Our mammalian instinct to prepare the birthing nest
What do we have to learn from other birthing mammals that can help the labouring woman? Michel Odent makes the case for de-humanising childbirth. At the end of her first pregnancy,...
An ecstatic freebirth and lotus birth experience
I first met Zoe, an ecstatic birth educator, when she booked a maternity session with me. From the moment we met we became friends, and she became my muse. I have a big interest in the different transformations we as humans go through, and I’m passionate about trying to find ways to document these pivotal moments in our lives. When she asked me if I would photograph her ecstatic freebirth, I didn’t hesitate to say yes. The birth space is where I feel at home. We then began talking about capturing the whole transformation of Zoe becoming a mother for the first time. Zoe shares her ecstatic freebirth I wanted to birth my son into the world through love and pleasure, for his journey to begin in peace and free of any trauma. Being trained as an ecstatic birth educator and witnessing many births unfold that the birther declared to...
An ecstatic freebirth and lotus birth experience
I first met Zoe, an ecstatic birth educator, when she booked a maternity session with me. From the moment we met we became friends, and she became my muse. I...
Birthing from within: how to prepare for a posi...
When I was pregnant, despite reading everything I could get my hands on I felt afraid, alone, daunted and unprepared for this rite of passage that lay before me. I knew the facts, but I did not know if or how I could give birth. The doctor and midwife team knew the exact proportions of my blood and urine, and listened to the butterfly beat of my unborn’s heart, but knew nothing of my heart, my deepest fears, those things which would have probably more impact on the birthing process than anything that they were testing. There was not time. It was not their job. I knew I needed to prepare, but how? Asking questions of those who had gone before me was a start. But their unconsciousness of their own birthing processes created as many new worries for me as it gave reassurance. And so I continued to read, haunting...
Birthing from within: how to prepare for a positive birth
When I was pregnant, despite reading everything I could get my hands on I felt afraid, alone, daunted and unprepared for this rite of passage that lay before me. I...